Melancholias

colours of life

God made my day. It’s red, purple, blue, black, white, and grey. God made every detail of my life to made me stronger each day.
i should practise gratitude in every detail He made for me. But sometimes i just feel like not that strong to give thank. sometimes, i just straightly cried for something insignificant yet so buried myself alive for such a moment.

I am too weak now. I thought I already a bit mature in this, but I was wrong. There’s nothing right in my thoughts, I guess. Everything is perfectly like a bunch of fantasies rushing and running today, and when I wake up the day after tomorrow, it all went away. Just like the broken stereo that I wish never been happened before. My mind just acted like a broken shelter that is more and more fissure each day.

I really dont know what i’ve been written. those talks with my aunt had ruined my thankful day to the most annoying and disturbing day ever. I just need to get sleep now and forgetting all that’s been happened today. I’m painfully get depressed by now. Hopefully all these sadness washed away by tomorrow.

God, please recover my heart from this pain. please..

Jakarta, 8.52 pm

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