abandoned

EWH! i need to write something here. i swear i need to write something here, on my blog. but in fact, i don’t know what to write. wazz wrong with me? whyy i feel so numb recently. feels like my brain can’t really work like it should be.

i found out that i have such a well development in my faith to Jesus. yeahh.. i never missed the nite and morning prays which is not soo lousy anymore. well it’s not perfect, but it’s not lousy and i feel great. I pray about many many things. In addition to my only wishes to God, I also pray about parents, family, Priest, and so on and so on.

I feel such a cozy warm was flowing on my body when i did that.

okay. that’s a warp.

maybe i should go refreshing my mind. it feels so hectic here. okay. i’m goin..

an ideal man alive

1. Nicholas Saputra
2. Johny Depp
3. Kimura Takuya
4. Lee Min Ho
5. Vic Zhou

sekian dan terima kasih.

PS: the most post ga penting ever!

kejang

yash. dari mana sii datangnya keberadaan yang abstrak itu. ahh.. aku ketakutan.
dia menerjangku.
siapa?
siapa dia?
panglima perang berbaju kuning?
panglima perang bersuara ngebass yang aneh tapi kiyut itu?
aku terperangah.
terkejut aku dibuatnya.
seketika aku lemas.
tak berdaya.
enggan ku marah tapi malas kuberulah.
oke. kita tutup saja.
semoga malam ini aku melupakan semuanya dan besok hari yang baru untuk diberlakukan.
ketika semua bergerak maju, jangan mintaku untuk mundur dong.
mari menanyakannya pada angin dan bersekutu dengan air.

selamat tinggal panglima.
mungkin suatu saat kita bertemu lagi.
dan aku akan berpura-pura tidak mengenalimu lagi.

try sleeping with broken heart

Even if you were a million miles away
I could still feel you in my bed
Near me, touch me, feel me
And even in the bottom of the sea
I can still hear inside my head
Telling me, touch me, feel me
And all the time you were telling me lies

So tonight I’m gonna find a way to make it without you
Tonight I’m gonna find a way to make it without you
I’m gonna hold onto the times that we had
Tonight I’m gonna find a way to make it without you

Have you ever tried sleeping with a broken heart
Well you can try sleeping in my bed
Lonely, only, nobody ever shut it down like you
You wore the crown, you make my body feel heaven-bound
Why don’t you hold me, need me, I thought you told me
You’d never leave me

Looking in the sky I can see your face
And i knew right where I’d fit in
Take me, make me
You know that I’ll always be in love with you
Right til the end

So tonight I’m gonna find a way to make it without you
Tonight I’m gonna find a way to make it without you
I’m gonna hold onto the times that we had
Tonight I’m gonna find a way to make it without you

Anybody could have told you right from the start
It’s bout fall apart
So rather than hold onto a broken dream
Or just hold onto love
And I could find a way to make it
Don’t hold on too tight
I’ll make it without you tonight

So tonight I’m gonna find a way to make it without you
Tonight I’m gonna find a way to make it without you
I’m gonna hold onto the times that we had
Tonight I’m gonna find a way to make it without you

-alicia keys-

the saddest part is, till tonight, i cant and i found myself not gonna find a way to make it without you. am i just that into you, dear porcupine?

PS: suddenly this song title appear on my twitdeck from Mr. Darren Hayes. He said it’s the best song for this year. and yes.. it’s soooooooo good.

another songs heard: cemburu menguras hati by vidi aldiano, as lovers go by dashboard confessional

 

Coba Katakan

walking and walking

yep. ini malam kedua aku merasakan detak rasa yang sama seperti beberapa waktu lalu ketika pertama kali mendengar lagu Coba Katakan-nya Maliq, tapi ya seperti biasa juga. lagu Maliq kalau lama-lama didengar akan sangaaaaat membosankan. well well bukan itu esensinya.

kali ini akan kusambungkan dengan status di fesbuk yang baru saja ku post:

If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost. That is where they should be. Now put the foundation under them. – Henry David Thoreau-

jadi apa hubungannya lagu maliq dengan quote nya Henry David Thoreau ini?

well well, in my thoughts, kata2nya di Henry David Thoreau ini membuatku merasa perlu bermimpi lagi dan mencoba mengatakannya pada dunia.

aku punya impian. banyaaak sekali. sama seperti orang-orang.

hanya saja sampai sekarang belum satupun dari impianku itu yang teralisasi.

tidak, aku tidak akan menyerah. Tuhan pasti tahu yang terbaik untukku. Dia akan memberikanku yang terbaik pada waktunya.

I know I’m not that smart, I dont have any real experience of the implementation of my collage. so, should i cry and decided to kill myself?

well, actually, i’ve ever thought of it. hehehe.

namun, menurut Albert Einstein, It’s not that I’m so smart, it’s just that I stay with problems longer dan Thomas Edison, Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.

Jadi yah jangan menyerah dan tiap hari berusaha sebaik-baiknya menjalani hidup. yah, hal-hal kecil yang mungkin bisa kulakukan sekarang mungkin

1. Tidak merugikan orang lain.
2. Tidak membuang sampah sembarangan.
3. Mengutip sampah yang sangat mengganggu pemandangan
4. Membereskan kamar yang berantakan.
5. Rajin ngeblog agar pikiran tidak mampet.
6. Rajin blogwalking untuk berjalan-jalan tidak pakai uang (selain uang internet yang emang tiap bulan selalu dibayar mama)
7. Tidak memakan junk food lagi (mahaaal)
8. menjalani hidup sehat
9. dan sekarang sudah 12/365. kapan akan berakhir? =( yeahh… belajar menghitung hari
10. makin rajin berdoa. doa untuk diri sendiri, doa untuk orangtua, keluarga, teman, lingkungan, negara, dan dunia. itu sangat-sangat melegakan.
11. mulai mencari kegiatan berguna lain tanpa mengeluarkan terlalu banyak biaya.

yeah. dalam hidup, banyak yang bisa kita lakukan. mungkin hal-hal yang kuutarakan tadi bukan suatu hal yang wah dan bisa dinikmati dengan adrenalin dan kepuasan yang tinggi, namun dengan kesederhanaan dan pola yang kecil aja bisa dipertanggungjawabkan, aku yakin Tuhan ga akan akan segan-segan memberikan tanggung jawab yang lebih besar lagi.

well, banyak para ahli yang mengungkapka pengertiannya akan makna hidup. apapun pengertian hidup yang mereka utarakan, hidup tetaplah sesuatu yang dijalani.

yeah.. that’s a wrap.

am going to dreamland soon.

see yah

**

Current watch: Queen Seon Duk every monday to friday

my current condition

berantakan dan jepret

1. Mencoba menikmati saat-saat ini.
2. Tidak keluar rumah jika tidak terlalu penting, mengirit.
3. Tidak bisa mendeskripsikan diri sendiri.
4. Tidak menyukai pria manapun dalam kapasitas cinta, tapi masih berharap pada sang tokoh prcpn itu. Oh Tuhan, ampuni aku ya.
5. Masih belum nonton This is it. Kejauhan.
6. Merasa keberadaan sahabat itu sebenarnya ga ada. yng ada ya teman baik. tapi itu hanya ada di sini saja.
7. Masih mencari perkerjaan.
8. Banyak-banyak berdoa.
9. Malas nge blog.

and currently,, the most currently song i listen to:

You would not believe your eyes
if ten millioin fireflies
lit up the world as I fell asleep

‘Cause they’d fill the open air
And leave teardrops everywhere
You’d think me rude
But I would just stand and stare

I’d like to make myself believe
that planet Earth turns slowly
It’s hard to say that I’d rather
Stay awake when I’m asleep
‘Cause Everything is never as it seems

‘Cause I’d get a thousand hugs
from ten thousand lightning bugs
as they tried to teach me how to dance

A foxtrot above my head
a sockhop beneath my bed
a disco ball is just hanging by a thread

I’d like to make myself believe
that planet Earth turns slowly
It’s hard to say that I’d rather
Stay awake when I’m asleep
‘Cause Everything is never as it seems
(when I fall asleep)

Leave my door open just a crack
(please take me away from here)
‘Cause I feel like such
an insomniac
(please take me away from here)

Why do I tire of counting sheep
(please take me away from here)
When I’m far too tired
to fall asleep

To ten million fireflies
I’m weird ’cause I hate goodbyes
I got misty eyes as they said
farewell

But I’ll know where several are
if my dreams get real bizarre
’cause I saved a few
And I keep them in a jar

I’d like to make myself believe
that planet Earth turns slowly
It’s hard to say that I’d rather
Stay awake when I’m asleep
‘Cause Everything is never as it seems
(when I fall asleep)

I’d like to make myself believe
that planet Earth turns slowly
It’s hard to say that I’d rather
Stay awake when I’m asleep
‘Cause Everything is never as it seems
(when I fall asleep)

I’d like to make myself believe
that planet Earth turns slowly
It’s hard to say that I’d rather
Stay awake when I’m asleep
Because my dreams are bursting
at the seems

Fireflies by Owl City

park anywhere near the place.

hey bubble pie

aku berjalan. kemudian aku bertemu dengan ruang dan waktu kemudian dia menahanku dan merubahku.

hal-hal yang belum pernah aku lakukan sebelumnya kini kulakukan.

aku berharap ini untuk selanjutnya.

kukira sampai sekarang hanya mereka yang kupunya dan aku bersyukur untuk itu.

aku bersyukur karena Tuhan menciptakan dua orang itu untuk menemaniku melalui hariku.

Mama, Bapak, Aku cinta kalian.